Three weeks ago, for the first time in my twenty-nine years, I saw a woman who has finally gotten it right.
She has a major presence in pop culture, is one of the best female vocalist of our time, and has did things differently than most in her generation.
We (I) have grew up in a generation where media (and now social media) perpetuates sex, violence, money, power and fame like no ones business. Girls are seeing images everyday that it's okay to drop it low and spread em wide, have babies by whomever tickles their fancy; all the while, repercussions of such actions are often swept under the rug.
No, I'm not condemning them.
I would never do that because just seven or eight years ago I was spreading it wide just like the rest. Walking around with an attitude like it's okay to have sex with whomever I want and if I got pregnant I would just raise my child like all the other single ladies do, and ultimately chuck up the deuces to thoughts of settling down with a decent brotha.
I use to believe it was important to use them (men) up before they could use me up and in the process I tallied up quite a (in)decent amount of sexual partners before I said, "I do."
All of this was okay on BET, MTV, movies, and the music I listened to and for the most part, none of that has changed. I still hear the same songs and see the same images. It's still making a presence on the Amazon best sellers list and as each passing day goes by, it's becoming more and more acceptable in little girls eyes to have sex way before someone puts a ring on it.
I'm determined to give my little girl an opposite representation of the images I grew up with, and thank God there are strong, fierce women out there who don't give a crap about what other people think or say about them. Women like Beyonce, who have stepped forward to break a barrier that some women didn't know existed.
I've seen Christians bash Beyonce on social media about her lack of social responsibility with this new album of hers and I snicker to myself. Heck, I'm a Christian...am I less of one because I love her new album?
They must not realize that this sistah is married.
Unlike many others in the music and acting game (I won't name any names) she is one of the rare women in the industry that kept her good girl image until she was married. I think she was very aware of her social responsibility and she showed me that it was important to her to be careful of how she portrayed herself, up until a certain point. She knows that she has young girls who look up to her.
Now she has unleashed Yonce and people don't know how to act. She released a visual album (an album which I have been rockin since she dropped it) and shared apart of herself that shows an image I would LOVE for my daughter to grow up seeing.
An image that says, when you're married (and not one second before that), you can get your grown woman on with your husband. You can tell the driver to roll up the partition so you and your man can have a little fun before a night out on the town. That you can be drunk in love, and of course, my favorite..."rocket till waterfalls..."
See, I grew up with images around me that said sex before marriage is okay, and that's exactly how I lived. Not because I didn't know any better, just because it was socially acceptable. I was raised by a single mother and I had no example of what it was like to have a solid institution of marriage. Just by the grace of God, did I happen not to get pregnant until I was on my honeymoon;)
Beyonce's image is solid to me.
She is a hardworking woman who met the man of her dreams. I don't know anything about her relationship with God, and I don't really think it matters for the purposes of this post, but all I'm saying is this...she waited until she was married, became a mother, and then and only then, did she unleash a sensual side of her that have critics talking out the side of their necks.
If my little girl grows up wanting to be like Bey, I can't be mad at that!
This tells me that she is aspiring to be something other than what is being portrayed in the media. She wants to grow up being a classy, hardworking diva, who isn't afraid of being a freak in the closet for her husband, yet encouraging other (married) women that when you have papers on your boo...feel free to "ride it like a surfboard."
Moral of this little story...don't be so sure of yourself that you fail to look around you and see the bigger issue at hand. Beyonce's music is a part of the secular culture. Kim Kardashian's reality show is a part of the secular culture. So many differences between the two that I won't even bother pointing out. The fact is girls are looking up to both of these women.
Unfortunately, there are a lot of things out there in the world that do not represent the Christian values in which we believe and our kids more than likely will be exposed to them at some point. However, if there is one individual within that secular portion of the world that we so effortlessly try to shield them from, who is giving girls an image that they need to see instead of what they expect to see...how can we hate on her for that?
Beyonce did it right and for that I think condemning, self-righteous Christians should leave her alone.
And on another note...talking about sex as a Christian woman doesn't phase me one bit. In fact, I encourage it and I think the Unveiled Wife says it best in her post about why she thinks Christians should talk about sex.
Just thought I'd give the high highfalutin something to think about...
I just lost some friends, didn't I? Ha!